Romanticize 28: Every Day Is Your Birthday

Today—from a calendar perspective, at least—is mine.

Here I am turning 42, and I can’t say I’m terribly sad to see 41 in my rearview—it was a year incessantly marred with challenges and hardships, and I’m hopeful that this next one will bring more clarity and cleared paths. I’ve always been a big fan of birthdays as a day to reflect, nourish, and play things fast and loose; I almost never know what I’ll do to celebrate, but I delight in trying and seeing new things and following my in-the-moment impulses entirely.

In this spirit, I like to think of every day as a birthday, because why should we live this way just one day a year? There’s always something to celebrate (even if it’s just getting out of bed—believe me, I’ve been there and been there and been there). So for today’s Romanticize, I’d like to inspire you to have a birthday-esque day whenever the mood strikes.

The Romanticize

Treat any day like it’s your birthday!

The Advice

• Not sure what to do with your “birthday”? First, sit quietly and tune in with yourself. Do you just want to spend the day on the couch, relaxing and ordering takeout? Are you feeling the need to be in nature? Want to try a new restaurant or indulge your craving for a specific kind of food? Feel like taking a trip to the theater to see a new movie or play? Great! Get to it!

• Sometimes I like to start with one place and see where it takes me. Last year on my birthday I knew I wanted to be outside, so I found a local wildflower preserve I’d been meaning to visit. Once I’d walked every meandering petal-strewn path, I pulled up my map app and looked for a well-rated nearby restaurant. I ended up at a gorgeous historical spot that served up some of the best fish and chips I’d ever tasted. Sometimes, the open road (or public transportation line) can guide you from place to place.

• What’s most important for this day is that you treat it with the reverence of a birthday. Really make yourself and your whims the center of attention. You’re more than worth it!

The Inspiration

Unlike prior years, my day was semi-planned already—I knew I had an afternoon appointment and an evening dinner date. Generally, expectations, schedules, and time constraints cause me stress, which is why I veto them on my birthday, but today I found I didn’t really mind having a bit of structure.

First, I opened a box of sweet little gifts that arrived in the mail from my sister Lindsay. She knows me too well—I’m utterly obsessed with literally everything from New York City jewelry shop Catbird. To those of you who are just discovering it thanks to me: you’re welcome/I’m sorry.

Next, I ordered myself a yummy takeout breakfast and ate it at one of my favorite cemeteries. Then, I took my annual birthday self-portrait at a different cemetery. I’ve been honoring this tradition since 2018 (age 37, for those counting) and I love that it charts my changing visual style, photographic abilities, and written reminiscences throughout the years.

Next was my first official appointment of the day—for a tattoo with local artist Rich Cahill, which I booked months ago. One of Rich’s many talents is super detailed line work, and I knew he was the perfect pick for the death’s head symbol tattoo I’ve long wanted to get. The design is based on a circa-1691 symbol I saw on a headstone at New York City’s Trinity Church Cemetery, and it came out just perfect!

Last, I met my girlfriends (who I lovingly refer to as my coven) for dinner at one of my favorite nearish-by Italian restaurants, Sette Luna. I got to meet our newest coven member, baby Juniper, and the meal capped off the sweetest of days—I’m so grateful for all the wonderful people, places, and opportunities in my life. Happy birthday to all of us!

I’d love to know the results of your Romanticize—feel free to share your experience in the comments, or tag me on Instagram. Until next Wednesday, fellow romantics!